Experience greater peace and physical, mental and spiritual health as you learn to let go. Resilience feels impossible in certain situations but learning to bounce back and let go has some incredible benefits. I too have been hurt and damaged. The pain of denial and deceit is not strange to me. It took me a long time, almost too long, to move past some of my more troublesome memories. Even still, moving past something is not always the same as letting it go. Time helped me to move past my problems and not think of them constantly, but sadness and anger still lingered around my tender circumstances.
My belief and understanding of Qadr along with the self-respect I have learned to harness over the last few years allows me to see much more clarity. Though moving past my experiences was difficult, I knew I had to let go of the pain that kept me stagnant. I felt cursed and simply lacked mental and emotional resilience.
When we get hurt, we are allowed to feel hurt. It becomes a problem, however, when we hold on to it for weeks, months, or even years. Holding on to pain and anger for that long can be more damaging than the initial offense was. We start to become bitter and angry towards others and ourselves. Some may even question their Lord as to why these things have happened to them.
Here are some benefits from practicing resilience and learning to let go. Use these as a motivation.
1. Firm Faith
Al-Qadr is an Arabic word meaning Allah’s divine decree or predestination of measurements and sustenance of everything and everyone, according to His Knowledge and Wisdom. It comprises the following four aspects:
Knowledge - The belief that Allah’s knowledge encompasses everything and there is wisdom behind everything that occurs, whether we understand it or not.
It's been written/Pre-Recorded - The belief that Allah recorded everything in a Tablet that He kept with Himself, called 'Al-Lawh Al-Mahfooth' (The Preserved Tablet).
The Will of Allah - The belief that nothing, whether related to Allah’s actions or actions taken by His creation, can occur without His permission.
Allah is the Creator - The belief that Allah created all creation, all what they possess of attributes, and all their actions. Allah Says : “Allah is the Creator of all things, and He is, over all things, Disposer of affairs.” [Quran 39:62] And: “…He has created each thing and determined it with [precise] determination.” [Quran: 25:2]
2. Reduced Stress
Pretty simple and straight forward. Life gets a bit easier the more we learn to really let go of things we cant change. There's no point stressing over your past; it's over.
3. Health Benefits
With that reduced stress comes an astonishing number of health benefits. Stress can be linked to heart diseases, mental illness, and so much more. Holding on to sadness, bitterness, negativity and anger can be life threatening.
4. Uncluttered Mind
When you are holding on to so much mental and emotional stress it produces brain fog and your mental capacity decreases. This will make it difficulty to process beneficial information and keep you intellectually stagnant.
5. Becoming Unwavering
Building up that resilience will not only help us move past and let go of situations from our past, but it will also prepare you for the future, too. Once the trait is natural to us, we will start to see problems as a means to strengthen us and help us grow. We face the obstacles in our path knowing that Allah has strategically put them there for us. We begin to sulk over things less and less. What once lingered on our minds causing us grief, now seems to roll off of us.
6. Clearer Thinking
This one might be similar to number 4 on the list, but I thought it deserved its own spot. With the calmer mind, comes a cleverer one. When emotion is out of the picture, logic is free to guide us more. We make smarter decisions under a clearer mind.
One of the most important benefits of accepting Allah's Qadr and letting go is the security that comes with it.
We will be happier. There is a great relief that comes with overcoming trials in our lives. After thinking more clearly and not being wavered, we have time to reflect on our progress. Our hard work paid off and life is that much sweeter.
I believe most importantly, we are free. Free from the negativity & guilt, free from the pain, deceit, and suffering. Maybe things will never go back to normal for whatever situation we had, but we will survive. We are better for it and when you know better, you should do better. The lesson we have learned, the knowledge that we now have, the ability to overcome; it's all so empowering. We go about life with a different confidence.
10. Cool, Calm, and Collected
Having a calmer and collected manner, with things not affecting us as severely, the need for extreme emotion is lost. We start to learn how to regulate our stress and what we will give energy to.
Trusting in Qadr and letting go does not mean allowing ourselves to get hurt again. We can move on with the understanding that everything is meant to be and still be wise enough to not fall into the same pitfalls again. Use caution and practice good judgement.